How to Fart Less

Its simple: clean out your colon. Eliminate intestinal dysbiosis.

In other words, spend a week sweeping your internal floors & washing your counters (I mean, sweeping & washing out your large intestine), kill off and expel the intestinal parasites and yeast that are sitting inside you right now (yes – inside your own gut, eating your lunch, making more farts), finally get rid of that hotdog you ate in 1987, and you’ll notice a dramatic improvement in your fart quality. That is, if you think that less smelly and less often is an improvement!!

But seriously: if you’re smart and you’ve never heard of colon hydrotherapy or dysbiosis, do some reading. Mainstream culture doesn’t talk about the subject much. Do a Google search for “colon cleanse” and look at the images. If you see the pics and still decide not to do anything, you can’t blame others when you get grumpy or sick in a few years!

(Phhhhhhrrrrrt…)

Don’t worry though – its not like you’ll completely stop farting if you clean out your rear end. After all, that would almost make the whole procedure almost not worth it.